@ http://www.buddhadharma.org/EightVerses/

Composed by the Buddhist Master Langri Tangpa (1054-1123), Eight Verses for Training the Mind is a highly-revered text from the Mahayana Lojong (mind training) tradition. These instructions offer essential practices for cultivating the awakening mind of compassion, wisdom, and love. This eight-verse lojong enshrines the very heart of Dharma, revealing the true essence of the Mahayana path to liberation.

As we practice these lojong teachings in daily life, we train the mind to embrace reality in a completely wholesome, wise, and compassionate way. These excellent practices help us purify our negativity and awaken the heart by giving us a way to transform adversity and hardship into a direct opportunity for spiritual growth. In this way, rather than perceiving difficult people or adverse circumstances in our lives as an obstacle, tragedy, or punishment, we now meet these experiences with deep compassion, wisdom, and skill, using them as the actual path to enlightenment.

By way of these treasured practices we eliminate our competitive, selfish, and reactive nature, as well as our false and exaggerated concepts of self (also called self-grasping and self-cherishing). It is important to understand that the greed, jealousy, anger, pride, selfishness, and attachment, which cause us so much suffering, are actually misperceptions of reality, not inherent conditions of our mind. Therefore, these precious lojong practices can purify our misperceptions and delusions completely, revealing the natural radiance, clarity, wisdom, and compassion of our true nature.

With the heartfelt desire and determination to attain enlightenment
For the welfare of all living beings, who are more precious than a
Wish-fulfilling jewel for accomplishing the supreme goal,
May I always cherish them and hold them dear.

Verse I – Cherishing and caring for others is the source of all happiness. Cherishing ourselves over others is the source of all suffering and negative conditions in this world. Therefore, our determination to attain enlightenment should always be motivated by our heartfelt desire to serve the welfare of all living beings. The attainment of enlightenment is the supreme goal. Our enlightenment comes from the cultivation of bodhichitta (the awakening mind of love, compassion, and wisdom). Bodhichitta arises from our deepest compassion. To develop this compassion and reach the supreme goal, we need others. In this way, all living beings are the principle source for our spiritual development and for accomplishing the supreme goal of enlightenment. In addition, at some time each of us has been, and will be, a source of great kindness and benefit for one another. The immense kindness of all living beings is integral to our own human existence. Considering this, we can understand how living beings are even more precious than a wish-fulfilling jewel and that we should always cherish them and hold them dear.

Whenever I am with others
May I think of myself as the lowest of all
And from the very depths of my heart
May I respectfully hold others as supreme.

Verse 2 – This verse calls us to train the mind in proper humility, eliminating our habitual arrogance and pride by ‘thinking of ourselves as the lowest of all.’ This is certainly not suggesting we belittle ourselves; we should have self-esteem and self-confidence. Rather, a practice is being offered for taming our exaggerated sense of self-importance and for cultivating true humility and respect for others. The afflictions of arrogance, superiority, pride, and competitiveness create disharmony among people and prevent us from learning and evolving. Therefore, by respectfully holding others as supreme, we become more humble, gentle, and open. This naturally brings harmony and compassion into our relationships and helps us to achieve great qualities, virtues, and spiritual realizations.

In all actions, may I closely examine my state of mind,
And the moment a disturbing emotion or negative attitude arises,
Since this may cause harm to myself and others,
May I firmly face and avert it.

Verse 3 – This verse calls for the sincere practice of mindfulness, closely examining our state of mind throughout all our actions. Through this practice of mindfulness, the teachings encourage us to firmly face and avert any disturbing emotions or negative attitudes the very moment they arise. The reason for this is that our delusions, disturbing emotions, and negative attitudes can provoke us to think, speak, or act in nonvirtuous ways which may cause harm to ourselves and others. This behavior brings karmic consequences and perpetuates our delusion and suffering. Therefore, throughout the day, while working, driving, walking, studying, talking with others, and so forth, we should closely examine our state of mind and heart. By training our mind in this skillful way, we will be able to firmly face and avert disturbing emotions and negative attitudes as they arise and before they develop any further momentum or power.

Whenever I meet people of unpleasant character
Or those overwhelmed by negativity, pain or suffering,
May I cherish and care for them as if I had found
A rare and precious treasure difficult to find.

Verse 4 – When we encounter unpleasant people, or those overwhelmed by negativity, pain, or suffering, we often prefer to ignore or avoid them rather than cherish and care for them. We may consider ourselves to be more important or more evolved than such beings, and we usually turn from them, as we do not want to be bothered, hurt, or contaminated by their condition. This verse suggests reversing our usual self-cherishing attitude by learning to cherish and care for such people, being joyful and grateful as if we had found a rare and precious treasure. To overcome the delusion and egoism of our self-cherishing, we view this encounter as an opportunity to serve and bring happiness to others, rather than a nuisance to be avoided. In this way, our self-cherishing mind diminishes and our compassion deepens so as to embrace all living beings without exception.

Whenever others, because of their jealousy, treat me badly
With abuse, insult, slander, or in other unjust ways,
May I accept this defeat myself
And offer the victory to others.

Verse 5 – Learning to accept loss and defeat for ourselves and offering gain and victory to others is the very foundation of the bodhisattva practice. Although it may appear, at the worldly level, that we suffer loss by way of this practice, ultimately the practitioner receives the greatest benefits of spiritual wealth and virtue. In learning to accept harsh or unjust treatment, we should not allow ourselves to react with anger, behave in the same nonvirtuous ways in return, or to abandon others because of their actions toward us. This is the essence of accepting defeat and offering the victory, and the accomplishment of supreme patience and kindness. By accepting defeat and offering the victory to others, with the pure motivation of heartfelt compassion, we destroy the ignorance of our self-cherishing at its very roots.

When someone whom I have benefited
Or in whom I have placed great trust and hope,
Harms me or treats me in hurtful ways without reason,
May I see that person as my precious teacher.

Verse 6 – When we are kind to people, helping them, giving them our trust and hope, we naturally expect to be treated kindly in return. When people repay our kindness and trust by harming us or treating us in hurtful ways, we often react with anger, hurt, or disappointment. After such an experience, we may find it difficult to give them our love and respect. This type of ordinary love is conditional and impure. As practitioners, we want to embrace a situation such as this with skillful wisdom, compassion, and unconditional love. Therefore, it is essential that we have a way to transform these difficult experiences into the actual path to enlightenment. To accomplish this, we learn to see a person who harms us or treats us in hurtful ways, as our precious teacher. This person becomes our precious teacher because of the priceless dharma lessons we receive. Through their kindness, we also receive the ripening and purification of our own negative karma, which is the inevitable result of our having done a similar thing to someone in the past. In this way, we can see how even our worst enemies can be our greatest benefactors and precious teachers.

In brief, may I offer both directly and indirectly all help,
Happiness and benefit to all beings, my mothers,
And may I secretly take upon myself
All of their harmful actions, pain and suffering.

Verse 7 – This verse refers to the essence of Tong-len practice (Giving and Taking). We are to offer, directly and indirectly, our help, happiness, benefit, skills, and resources in loving service to all beings who certainly, at some time in the past, have been our own mothers. In Tong-Ien practice, with strong compassion, we visualize taking on the obstacles, problems, illnesses, and suffering of others. We then visualize giving them all of our happiness, comfort, love, virtue, prosperity, and great insights. In this verse the word ‘secretly’ suggests this particular practice of compassion may not be suitable or may be too difficult for beginning practitioners. It also means that this practice should be done discreetly, and not openly displayed or spoken about so as to gain praise or recognition.

May I keep all of these practices undefiled by stains of the eight worldly
Cconcerns (gain/loss, pleasure/pain, praise/blame, fame/dishonor),
And by recognizing the emptiness and illusory nature of all existing things,
May I be liberated from the bondage of attachment and mistaken views of reality.

Verse 8 – It is essential that our spiritual practice not be defiled or stained by the eight worldly concerns. For example, engaging in these practices hoping to be recognized or praised as an excellent dharma practitioner is not the right motivation. Nor should we practice with expectations of gaining something special or pleasurable for ourselves. Our motivation for practice must not become polluted or obscured by worldly concerns and attachment. The right motivation is to act exclusively and compassionately for the benefit of other beings. Our mind training practice must also be unified with our direct perception of ultimate truth—emptiness. As we gain realization of ultimate truth, we understand the empty, illusory, and impermanent nature of all existing things. With this realization, grasping or clinging to external appearances, or being deceived by them, diminishes, and we gain liberation from the bondage of attachment and mistaken views of reality.

After opening my eyes, I remembered the schedule. I remembered that I did not have my camera to take in the beautiful though cloudy morning. And well I sighed to myself. At least I got a decent bed to sleep. And all good roomies.  So what if we were in silence.

I also remembered that I had to put my name down in the shower rota whereby we would be able to take showers once in three days.  Water was scarce and we had to be conscious about how we used it. So well, I had my chance the next day in the evening 6 :30.

I ran quickly down to the functioning toilets. Did my jobs and rushed quickly to sit on my chosen cushion.  And slowly like me all of us poured in.  We made ourselves comfortable and started the mindfulness meditation.

The lead of meditation was humorous and very intense. But something about her attitude just did not sit right. But I said to myself. Its all fine. And its all good. I had a good session. And then it was time for breakfast. The menu was porridge, bread butter/peanut butter,  bananas and tea of course. You could have tea with lemons which was always freshly stocked. This would be the same for the next ten days. I was excited about the peanut butter which was homemade from the kitchen but after two days it stuck to my throat and I could not have it. I was better off with porridge bananas and bread with butter. Safe and sound.

After breakfast it was time to freshen up. I spent the time reading up on books by Lama Yeshe and other nice books inside the Gompa. Some of us went back to their rooms. Some like me read, some went about their Karma Yoga jobs. I loved Lama Yeshe’s wisdom and insights. His books were so easy to read and understand. I was in the process of becoming his ardent fan. I like spirituality when its practical and Lama Yeshe makes it so smart and easy.

We started teachings at 9:00 and that went on to 11:00. We were taught about Bodhicitta, Delusions, Death, Karma and rebirth, Impermanence and one of the most difficult topics, Emptiness.  I felt very connected to the teacher who taught with her heart and was so patient with all the questions I asked. She was a 63 year old Australian Buddhist nun who went through the subjects with simplicity.

Obviously there were questions from all around. I had more than a few in my mind. To some I got partial answers and to some I did not. I agreed with some concepts and disagreed with some and well I realised I had to do some studying on my own.

11:00 AM was yoga time.  We had these sessions in the main Gompa with Lama Tsong Khapa looking on.  I love that life size statue. So much serenity. We had a wonderful person Sheila whose Karma Yoga job was to take us through an hour of yoga session to stretch our bodies since we would be sitting through.  I really liked her sessions because for each difficult posture she would have three or two different options to go about. From simplest to the toughest. It was like moving with the body’s flow and its important to do with what the body can.. inspite of all challenges.

After Yoga we had lunch at 12:15. Lunch was a mixture of Dal, Rice, Some veggies boiled or otherwise and salad. They would throw in some fruits too or a fruit salad. I remember after some 5 days we got mashed potatoes and one of the retreaters with an excellent sense of humor, lit up when he saw mashed potatoes.. He is a humorous one from England. I remember laughing when we were learning Emptiness and he quipped : Well, if we are empty, and if we were to refrain from saying “I” and replace it with “this body and mind” , the bartender would throw me out of the pub if I asked : “this body and mind needs a beer ” LOLOLOL

We had loads of humorous moments. Some somber ones. Some silly ones when someone went on re-explaining Buddha concepts from a Hinduism point of view. Obviously another Indian. He could not take the course after a while because one of the teachers were kind of condescending towards Indian attitudes and life and well he became quiet angry.

I think lunch was the best food time of the lot.My insides lit up too on seeing mashed potatoes.

Lunch and breakfast Entertainment : Monkeys.. loads of them. One day they would have a gala time snatching somebody’s breakfast and god !! they were swift and fearless.

We had Kalu and Ninj Ye ( doggies) who were supposed to guard us from the monkeys. Ninj Ye was more active but sometimes she got tired of chasing monkeys. Kalu was better off getting pets and some food from all of us.

Once, during breakfast, I stepped on Kalu’s tail by mistake and he squeaked in pain. When I said sorry with remorse and petted him for my mistake, he quickly turned around to sit where I was sitting and literally asked me for some food by constantly pawing my knee. It was like : “Sorry does not cut it.. if you are really sorry, give me some food !! Yeah !! “ Of course I understood and I gave him some bread from my plate.

After lunch, it was Karma Yoga time. So while some were cleaning the dishes, cleaning the toilets and some sweeping the different areas of the monastery, I also went ahead with my job of sweeping the corridor of one part of the monastery and cleaning the basins.

It was ironic.. I got the job I usually always ran away from every time. I hate sweeping and putting up mosquito nets.. LOL

So well karma eh  !!!  One cannot escape from it.

2:00 to 3:00 was discussion time. We would have questions based on the teachings. This was the only time we could talk and we had a nice time. We quickly were aware that one of us just could not take the teachings and he just did not believe in Karma. So well we said Bye to him. There were quite a few who left in the middle of the course.  So anyway, our discussion time was one of the good times where we discussed many things related to our lives and the teachings. It was interesting to hear so many different thoughts from so many different cultures and countries.

After discussion it was tea time and then it was back to teaching.

I enjoyed the teaching sessions a lot. So we had an animated discussion on why not to kill mosquitos since they were also sentient beings and how a mosquito could be our mother. Some said that what if the mosquito would be spreading malaria and wanted to drink our blood to and spread disease. How can we think that it was our mother..  The discussion went round and round till the teacher had to stop it.

It took some time for our western colleagues to have the concept of Karma sink in deep. Some still had questions but it was interesting how everyone was at least willing to listen and think about it. We really came to like the group and looked forward to the teachings everyday.  But though we wanted to know more, we just skimmed through the topics and rightly so since it was an introduction course.

We had breaks in between which I spent time reading Dharma books and texts to get a feel of what the beings thought about life. And I got addicted to the books. I could not finish them quickly enough. But it was good reading them. We are not allowed to read any other books other than Dharma books.  Tushita had a good library which had a good collection of books and movies.

After teaching it was time for guided and analytical mediation. Since I could not connect with the lead, it was quite difficult. I just went ahead with my own techniques and found peace there. Many found it very exciting and also had mini realizations.

We had some interesting changes to the daily schedule. Once we were taken on a walk to visit two Stupas. It was a good trek. I liked going there and spending some prayer time. Stupas in Buddhism have a lot of importance and has a strong energy around it. In spite of the constant rain, it was clear during the walk.  We also watched couple of videos of Dharma Talks by Jetsulma Tenzin Palmo. She is an inspiring woman.  I am reading her books : Cave in the Snow and Reflections on a Mountain Lake.

Quiet a story, being the first Western Nun ever and everyone wants to know about her experience of living high up in a cave for 12 years. Quite interesting.

The last evening we had a nice Light Offering ceremony. It was a beautiful moment.

We had our dinner everyday at 6:15 PM and it was Thupa Thupa and Thupa. I kind of got sick of it by the last day. I tried to add two different available sauces to make it worth swallowing.. But it was too much..  I think I will stay away from soup for a while.

I mean it was good.. but its enough for now.

7:30 to 9:00 after dinner would be spent on meditation again.  I liked these sessions since there was less talk by the teacher and more of singing mantras and visualizations as well.

We did the Buddha Mantra :

Tadyatha Om mune mune mahamunaye svaha.

I loved the Vajrasattva Mantra which is to be sung for purification.

oṃ vajrasattva samayam anupālaya
oṃ Vajrasattva! Preserve the bond!

Vajrasattvatvenopatiṣṭha
As Vajrasattva stand before me.

dṛḍho me bhava
Be firm for me.

sutoṣyo me bhava
Be greatly pleased for me.

supoṣyo me bhava
Deeply nourish me

anurakto me bhava
Love me passionately

sarva siddhiṃ me prayaccha
Grant me siddhi in all things,

sarvakarmasu ca me cittaṃ śreyaḥ kuru hūṃ
And in all actions make my mind most excellent. hūṃ

ha ha ha ha hoḥ
ha ha ha ha hoḥ

bhagavan sarvatathāgatavajra mā me muñca
Blessed One! Vajra of all the tathāgatas! Do not abandon me.

vajrū bhava mahāsamayasattva āḥ (hūṃ phaṭ)
Be the Vajra-bearer, Being of the Great Bond! āḥ (hūṃ phaṭ)

And many more..

The energy when all of us sing this is tremendous and we would go to bed with the mantra ringing in our heads. A nice way to go to sleep.

Sleep was a humorous story as well. Since we were working so much on our minds, consciously or subconsciously, I would be unlocking some past blocks and would have dreams. But the three of us would be pleasantly woken up by our beautiful Irish roomie LAUGHING  (HEE HEE HEE) in her sleep and talking something about the teachings and then LAUGHING (HEE HEE HEE) again. This went on night after night and the mind also learnt to ignore it !! We told her later and had a good laugh..   It was quite entertaining.

Anyways, the last day it was pretty emotional for many. I connected with some of them. We exchanged emails. And wished all of us well. And it was time for me to come back .

It was pouring and I was one of the last to go.  By this time, I was really missing Rocky and the birds and was ready to come back to the real world. I was glad I did this.

But the journey back had its own story.

I took an auto to Dharmashalla Bus Stand going all the way down. Something in me told me that I am going all wrong. This feeling always works when I am going the wrong way. I called up the bus guy and he says I have to come to Mc Leod Ganj whereas in the ticket it was written Dharmashalla Bus Stand.

So I took a cab all the way up to Mc Leod Ganj and get to know that my seat number is not the right and I am given a seat which is right at the end. This, inspite of booking the tickets a month ahead.  Well forget the fact that they took AC money for a standard bus. I am not even going there.

So I sit at the last seat. I see this Tibetan woman munching on chips and cookies and going on munching munching munching munching till the smell sickened me. I was just hoping that she would be ok and had a strong stomach.  And just as I thought, when the bus started to move, she started to look around to puke or whatever and it took forever to open the window.

The last seats were empty besides mine. I chose one corner and she sat herself on the other corner taking in some fresh air.  The sitting position came to lying position and she slept all around me.. My butt, my legs, pushing the middle of my butt, since I was also trying to sleep.

I softly urged her to go a little on the side but NO !! She was bound to have her sleep lying down, no matter where her head went.  I ultimately realised that either she will sleep or me. So I sat through the night and let her sleep.

Well that was not enough. The ride was pretty bumpy and we were thrown six inches high at every bump.. it being the last seat and I just held on with my whole strength and just when I thought there was solid ground, we would hit a bump and the Tibetan Woman SHRIEKED “AAAAAAAAAAA” at every bump and would wake up and then go to sleep again..

If I was not interrupted by her scream, it would be by the bump or it would be by her pushing me and my butt to any corner with her head..

I just gave up and sat it through. And well we had about 3 punctures. I took the time to just walk and talk to the colleagues and actually had a relaxing time.

Buddhism says, take away someone’s suffering and make it yours. And it earns merit in the karma world.

Well I certainly made sure that the lady slept in peace butt or no butt.

Reaching Delhi, I sat in the airport just glad that it was done and I was at peace again when I reached home.

Well, thats it .. I guess.

• Now my next step is to get a teacher to talk to me more about Buddhism.
• Read up a lot.
• And yeah attend more Dharma talks.
• Get some clarity and take up the 5 Mahayana Precepts

And practice Dharma in real life the best I can..

No killing, no lying, no stealing, no intoxicants, etc…

Lets test how far I can go with this.. Again, its the journey that matters..

May you all be happy and free from all the sufferings and delusions that keep making us rotating in the eight worldly dramas..

PS : My camera just did not work and I had to make do with photos from my mobile.

Image via Wikipedia

Walking the path of a mind quest from a very early on, there came a time when I was drawn to a particular Buddhist deity . I started to follow on the information and started to search for a master who knew more about this.

There are certain phases in my life where different energies have drawn me for different purpose and off I went attaining some kind of mini realizations.

My big picture was to bring all the same into practical life which would help the people connecting with my being  into getting some of that and practicing it in the same way as breathing.

Well I have not found that ease of practice for everything  and I dont think I will in this lifetime but I am still journeying and I am happy with the baby steps I make.

I was somewhat familiar with the idea of Buddhism but had not gone too deep since I was working with different energies and techniques and it held me quite steady and still does depending upon who needs what if they are guided to this little ol’me. This time I wanted to delve deeper with human emotions and also enhance what has worked for me and just like an answer, Tushita came along.

I really liked what I saw and as usual something told me that I would at least start to find some source of what I was looking for.

My quest was to understand the delusions of life and also to work with attachment with worldy dramas which our human mind is so accustomed to and so much relish in it.

Here I was all set to start my spiritual retreat. My goal with some questions in my mind, I planned my trip meticulously all the more so, as I was setting off on my own and it was extremely personal trip as well. I had a feeling that it would not be easy but well who said anything in life is easy ??? Specially if you are on any kind of a spiritual quest. Well at least that’s how it has always worked when I got into the next practice of learning something on the path always. Its like as if I am burned by the actions and memories of a many lifetimes and the suffering and pain always brings forth some profound realizations. I call it the rising of the Phoenix everytime I go through this.

The journey and the experience started when I reached Delhi. Was to go to Palika Place to wait for the bus. It was pouring like it was nobody’s business. I had to walk with my suitcase and my bag which became heavier and heavier. I walked for a while to see where the bus point was. It took me a while to find out since I don’t know Delhi well. Thankfully, in the midst of all that, I remembered to see the ticket and called the bus guy. He came there shortly and told us to wait at a point. I did not want to miss the bus so I stood near the pavement.. Silly of me I know but well I was too tired to go anywhere and it was better to stand in the thick sheet of rain waiting for it to abate. Even the umbrella could not shelter me.

A bus came along and though the people were kind enough to invite me, I decided to wait till others came along and then boarded. But it did not seem the end. It was full of travelers from abroad and well I was wondering if I was in the right place. Then it was announced that this bus would go to Manali. And this would just go to Majnu Ka Teela to transfer us to another bus. My ticket was for AC bus. Well I kind of just thought that any bus will do as long as it took me to Mc Leod Ganj. I was pretty peaceful.

Patience.. and lots of perseverance. I was focusing on my goal. To reach Tushita safe and sound. We boarded the actual bus and by this time, finding the bus was manna. I could already see that the bus was leaking. I somehow bargained for a seat that would be relatively less drippy. Outside the rain had stopped but I somehow knew it will catch up with us soon. I settled myself in and prayed that we started on time and reached at a reasonable time in Tushita. It was tough trying to sleep with a constantly rocking bus but well the destination was important.

I think there were loads of lessons in patience for me. And acceptance and making the best of the situation. It was 2: 00 AM when the bus stopped. I was having an urgent call of the nature and well so did some of the passengers. The toilet was far and it was dark. I realised that when the nature calls, no matter how far and what time, a good toilet keeps the fear away. Hahaha.. Looking at moi, some ladies followed me as well. There were no lights but Viola !! there was the torch.. My ultimate savior. Who could stop me ??

Anyway, I came back with a relieved empty bladder. The driver and the handyman were having a chai. Some passengers were stretching their legs. On asking the driver, he said we have 4 to 5 more hours to go. I had hot chai breathing in the relatively cool weather. After that we were back on the road, jittering, shaking and lolling this way and that on the bumpy road.

After sometime, it did not matter, the rain, the cold, the jerks, everything, it was as it the mind shut down and I woke to a very cloudy morning at Mc Leod Ganj. A fellow retreater was in the bus and we shared a cab to to get to Tushita. It was early morning and Tushita had not yet stirred. We went to the dining hall which is near the reception and it was time to wait. I put my head in my hands and went to sleep. I woke up time to time and then saw my colleague reading and then he too slept on one of the benches. It was breakfast time soon and then lunch. I paid about 90/- for the lunch.

Registration started at 1:00 PM. Finally !! I thought.. I waited and waited and waited between sleep and waking up sitting on the bench. Finally, they set up the tables to call people. The room was full of people from all over the world and well at first, I was stumped. Suddenly it was like I was in an alien country or something. At first, I could not believe I was the only Indian woman on this course. There were three more Indian men and well, I saw that the third man, was too shocked and left in a very short time. Time ticked on one hour, two and my name was not called. I waited and something in me told that my name was not there.

There was a little flutter of panic inside me. I had booked this course so well in advance. And, my name was not there in the list. Well, I calmly asked for them to write it down. By this time out of some 48 people, only 6 were left. But hey there is always a reason why something happens. We were all given Karma Yoga jobs as per our registration calls.

Karma Yoga jobs were part of our stay. We were each given a Karma Yoga job to do which could be cleaning dishes, sweeping the monastery floors in different areas, sweeping the monastery ground of the debris, cleaning the showers and And since I was so way behind, I could thank the Lord that I was not going to clean the toilets. Well at this point it was all about me and my happiness of course.

The ego of making the self happy was predominant and I rejoiced in that fact that I was happy since I had to sweep the corridor of one part of Tushita and clean the basins. Which was better than cleaning toilets. Well well well, little did I know how humbled and appreciative I would be of the same by the time the course ended. Right then, my main priority was to get myself to a dorm.

This body and mind just needed her butt to be settled somewhere before she could think. The international colleagues had a fixed price. But Indians could give some donations and get a seat. I decided to go for the 5220/- dorm with 4 occupants. I am led to about three levels up and I wonder : Good heavens, I have to climb up and down all the ten days even to go to the working toilets which were three level down. Sigh.. Well so be it.

By this time.. I am kind of in a state of acceptance, my main thought being: At least I will not be cleaning toilets… ( sheesh, how selfish could I be !!! but huh I was being human and honest to myself) We had to report back to the Gompa by evening so that we went through the introduction and the practicalities of what went where and the rules.. I entered my dorm and I saw that there were already two occupants there.

Sharyn, a beautiful Irish sprite who first gave me the impression that I have known her before.. and it was a happy connection. Anna, a polish lady living in London. And later the last occupant was Kaitlin, an Aussie working as an English teacher in Abu Dhabi.

I was happy that there was a good vibe in the room. Sharyn told us all upfront that she talked in her sleep. Kaitlin said she spoke too but in foreign language. Anna was quiet. I shamefully burst out that when I was really tired I would snore.. (blushing) But I saw that we took it very humorously and had a good laugh. We did chat a while introducing each other and some inconsequential stuff. We knew we would be in silence the next ten days. The room was comfortable and it was a cozy one. I rushed down to the Gompa and without thinking tried to appreciate the view before we went inside, I sat on a chair to relax.

And EEEEPSSS.. there was a pool of cold rain water which totally wet my backside to my skin.. I was like ARGHHHHHHH.. It was evening and I had just changed.. I felt like jumping up and down.. I tried to sit on a stone to dry myself but the weather was very damp and well no way was I going to sit in the Gompa with a wet backside.. I rushed upwards and changed again and by this time we all quietly went inside. On entering the Gompa, I felt a feeling of stillness and immense dedication to the retreat that I committed myself to.

I just knew that my purpose of coming here was very well connected and it was time for me to be here and I was beginning a new path of many many realizations in my life.. which would open up slowly but surely.. So all the chaos that I went through from the time I reached Delhi, the bus journey, the registration, being the only Indian woman there, the dorm distance, my wet backside… et al… ALL was forgotten in that moment.

I was content and I realized I had no regrets.. I was finally here and looking at so many intent faces around me, I was happy I was part of a group.. We went through the introduction process and we were told to select our meditation cushions and Buddhism has a comfortable way to meditate I must say. They have all kinds of cushions to make the sitting easy. I was glad for that. I chose a cushion next to the wall somewhere in the middle row and soaked in the atmosphere. The Gompa was in itself a beautiful place with old cupboards.. and we faced the 8 medicine Buddhas looking serenely at us. It was a place of the divine energy and it brought in a lot of stillness to the mind just by being there. We had dinner which was Tibetan Thupa.

We had an introduction to meditation in the evening and retired for the night.

I was at peace.